The Healing Journey is Tough

The healing journey is both physical and mental. For some of us, there’s a lot to heal. Regardless of how much we have to heal, it’s not a competition after all, we each have our own work to put in the process to heal and feel our best. The journey is full of ups and downs. Some of those will be physical and some of those will be mental, and at times it’s both. It’s like walking through a canyon and then it begins to rain, but there’s no shelter or place to take refuge. In those moments, it’s easy to feel like you’re stuck, life sucks, and you question when it will end and if the work and effort is even worth it.

Feelings are powerful, and we should honor them and acknowledge them, but that doesn’t mean they get to have full control over our lives and the actions we take based on those feelings.

The thing is, factually speaking, ending up in a canyon with a downpour is not the end of the world. Yes, it sucks, and it feels like the end of the world, but it’s not the end of the world. Sometimes it’s important to focus on facts over feelings. Feelings are powerful, and we should honor them and acknowledge them, but that doesn’t mean they get to have full control over our lives and the actions we take based on those feelings. Focusing on the facts can sometimes help us ground ourselves and be brought back to reality. Facts can help us get back on track, remember our goals and our ‘why’, and have the strength to keep moving forward, even when we don’t feel like it.

When I started this blog, I was right in there starting the Carnivore Cure elimination diet. I did very well and felt some immediate benefits to my health. However, perhaps this is a poor excuse, once I was hit with a gnarly cold, I struggled to get back to where I was with the elimination diet. Did I completely say “screw this!” and just throw it all away? No. Thank goodness, no! But, I struggled to get right back to where I’d left off. The reason this is negative for me is because the point of the diet is to learn what foods I am most sensitive to so that I can avoid them. While I was sick, I ended up adding in coffee and half and half without tracking properly whether or not I feel negative mental or physical symptoms from the foods and never tried to remove them and reintroduce them again. Decaf coffee with half and half lowkey turned into my comfort food. It’s one of the less harmful things I can do while coping with stress and emotions. At least, that’s what I tell myself to justify it. And I justify it because some of my PCOS symptoms have still improved, even without knowing for sure if my body would be better off without the coffee.

At the start of my last two menstrual cycles, I was able to just use a heating pad and no over the counter medications to calm the pain from cramps. That’s amazing! It’s a sign that my body is healing and that I’m managing the PCOS for my body much more effectively. Other data, such as my weight, might not be as favorable, but the cramps being significantly more mild is totally worth eating in an extreme way. Extreme at least based on the standard American diet. I have cut a lot of sugar and a lot of other additives to food by focusing on eating meat based and cooking 99% at home. I am largely carnivore with few carbs on a daily basis (such as coffee with half and half), and indulge in some select extra carbs every now and again (such as sourdough bagels). Otherwise, I’m keeping on track with a meat and animal based, low carb way of eating because I know it’s good for my body. I feel better on days I focus this way and I know it’s helping because of the improvement in my menstrual cycle, not just from a pain perspective, but also from a regularity and flow perspective.

...if I teleported to the destination, I wouldn’t appreciate being there and I would miss out on the learning and growth that happens only during the journey.

The healing journey is tough. Some days I am so ready to throw in the towel. Yet, I keep my ‘why’ at the forefront of my mind and I keep trudging. The canyon may be deep and wide, but that doesn’t mean it’s impossible for me to get to higher ground. It takes work and patience to make it to where I want to be and see the horizon again. So, as I write this, I take the time to look around in my canyon and notice the beauty that is within. In terms of the healing journey, that means I look around and notice how far I’ve come. For instance, I see that my skin and body overall are so much better than they were in the past. Sure my weight isn’t quite what I want it to be, but it’s still so much better than it used to be. It means I notice how my body reacts to different stressors, both from food and the environment, and I allow myself to be in awe of how amazingly intricate all the functions and systems of the body are. It means there is an appreciation for where I am, even if it’s not where I want to be knowing that if I teleported to the destination, I wouldn’t appreciate being there and I would miss out on the learning and growth that happens only during the journey.